I know I talk about relationships and how to keep one going as best you can a lot. One thing I have yet to talk about is when things go wrong or go too far.
With the lifestyle, there is a knifes edge between what is okay and what is abuse. More often than not we accept things as being okay when things are not okay.
For instance, if you are being punished when your partner is angry. Or punishing someone when you are angry. When things like this happen it can end up going farther than it should easily.
When a submissive says take out your pain and anger on me. That is a red flag to me. Not just because they aren’t expressing their limits but because I am afraid of myself. Every Dominant should be.
A Dominant’s job is to give the submissive what they need but they also need to understand that you can’t go all out on things. (Yeah, sure the submissive may have a high pain tolerance but a dominant should always hold back.)
Reasons for this are because if you let go you are not in control and can cause multiple issues with the submissive if you are not in control. The submissive gives the Dominant control and the instant they don’t have control then they are not a Dominant they are an abuser.
This brings me to different fetishes and kinks. There are a lot of people out there right now that are into a lot of things. Some that can be considered flags if not red flags are breeding or impregnation. Don’t get me wrong. I have these.
The issue with them is when you aren’t in a long-term relationship with the person and they are not on some form of birth control. Then you decide to breed someone. This can lead to a lot of issues on the man’s side.
If you as a Dominant breed someone and you aren’t in a relationship and said person just wants a baby or whatever. Yeah, that is hot but all that needs to happen is the woman has a paternity test ran on the child, and if they think it is yours at all they can link that child to you. Which can destroy your life.
There are a lot of pros and cons when it comes to things. Don’t get me wrong. Does breeding some random woman sound hot. Yeah, does it sound fun. Sure, but you have to be careful. This goes for bulls as well if you are into the hotwife or any derivative of that kink.
If she gets pregnant she can take you for everything you are worth.
I am not saying don’t have those kinks or fetishes. Nor am I saying don’t play them out. Just make sure that you are both ready for it along with its repercussions.
In today’s society, you can’t go on any form of social media without seeing some form of these kinks or fetishes. The key is to understand that just because you want these things doesn’t mean that they have to be real right now.
I have to remind myself that with Mother Lilith often. With the loss of our first. I have felt the need to try and get her pregnant again. The issue is I have to know that she is ready to be again. There are a lot of emotional, physical, and mental things that happen to a woman when she is pregnant. Things that as a man I know I may never truly understand.
What I do understand though is the fact that she may not be emotionally, mentally, or even physically ready to get pregnant again. So, I have to consider all that and talk with her about what she thinks and feels. It isn’t about just me. It is a relationship.
Both parties have a say. If it is a one-time thing and they just want a baby it could lead to some very bad things in life. There are also those couples that want a child but for some reason the guy can’t which can be okay if everything is done right.
Some people don’t have the money for the medical stuff to be done, so they look to the more natural way for things to work.
Just be cautious about things is all I am saying.
Just because you share the same kinks and fetishes doesn’t mean that you share them the same way. Some women may have a breeding kink and actually want to be bred or impregnated while a guy may just want to cum inside.
Talk to your partner whenever you have questions. Try to understand each other and work together towards a common goal. Never assume things, or force them. That leads to mistrust and abuse in the long term.
If you are a Dominant man and you end up getting a woman pregnant. My best suggestion is to talk with her and find out what she wants. If she just wants to have an abortion. Never tell her to get one. You can suggest it but never force or order them to. Support her through that. It isn’t easy to do that, and as a man, we will never know the pain a woman goes through in having an abortion.
If they choose to keep it and have a miscarriage be there for them. Help lift them up and understand that their emotions will be all over the place. You have to be their rock during this time. Do everything you can to help them see you are there to love and support them. Never downplay any of their feelings, that will just end up breaking them down in the end.
In the end, every one of us should be honorable and caring towards our partners. It is our job to support them through anything they are going through. From depression to other traumatic things. It is our job to be their rock just like it is their job to do the same for us when we are falling apart.